Sunday, May 19, 2013

"So whatcha, whatcha, whatcha want?...."

“While money can't buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.”
― Groucho Marx       
      The now classic comedy, Office Space features many memorable scenes and quotes including this philosophical question pondered by a disenchanted circle of friends and colleagues.

  Peter: Our high school guidance counselor used to ask us what you would do if you had a million dollars, didn't have to work, and, invariably, whatever you'd say, that was supposed to be your career. So if you wanted to fix old cars, then you're supposed to be an auto mechanic.
  Samir: So what did you say?
Peter: I never had an answer. I guess that's why I'm working at Initech.
Michael: No. You're working at Initech 'cause that question is bullshit to begin with. If everyone listened to her, there'd be no janitors because no one cleans shit up if they had a million dollars.

  Now what would you do with 600 million dollars? Like most people I know I bought not one but two Powerball tickets for last evenings drawing. My brothers and sisters, friends and co-workers all had visions of sensuous Hawaiian vacations, early retirement, purchasing large quantities of real estate or buying the Roush Fenway Racing Team dancing in our heads. Unfortunately, there was only one winner whose golden ticket was purchased in Florida. Damn it, it wasn't my brother, Steve either. We gamble at casino's, the horse track, bet on sports teams, buy lottery and Powerball tickets to fuel the fantasy that all life's problems would be solved if we had more money. Lovely fantasy. Here are a few more dream selections created by normal every day losers who recently had their hopes shattered too.

" I would buy every Game Stop in the United States"  (Sounds like my nephew.)
 "Here's what you should do if you won the 600 million dollars from the lottery. First, create a blind trust so that your identity can remain anonymous. Hire a team to help you to manage it. Pay off all your  debts. Give some money to children for college. Buy a nice home on the beach and retire. Remember to be smart in how you spend your money because you do not want to go bankrupt like the other lottery winners."   (Clearly, this person works for some practical financial services company and does not know how to dream properly. Where is the mention of owning your own chocolate factory or NFL franchise?)
"Build some technologically forward earth ships in Detroit, Michigan." (that's more like it)

If I hit the lottery I'd probably take a trip around the world, preferably to places where the locals aren't shooting at each other (or at Americans) all the time. "

"I would take $100,000 of it and go crazy spending it on everything from charity to exotic trips around the world. Then I would invest the rest of it and collect a check for $5000 every month. That might not be enough to live on but I suppose I could get a job and just be as cocky as I can be without the fear of getting fired.
Speaking of which- I think I would also find a fun job and work it for free just so I could get the opportunity to do it... like drawing the X and O patterns on the telestrater during live football games on TV."             Now that is a cleverly designed plan.